Asperger's, Anonymity and other ripples on the pond
Addendum 16.5.07 - see Postscript for experiences over on the other side of the pond.
I have a close relative, aged late 20s, with Asperger's. A was always the brightest kid on the block. Some years ago on work experience, before there was a diagnosis, A wiped the computers of the company providing the work experience, beyond and below the computers' factory settings. A was a bit of a genius, still is, with computers, but in those days was still experimenting.
Some years on, A has found an appropriate niche and is safe, as safe as any of us can be in this world, and enjoying life so far as a disablist society will allow. That means A has sheltered employment, sheltered accommodation and an accompanied social life.
A is still taken advantage of, usually without realising it until later, or when it is explained, then A is embarrassed and quiet and very hurt and retreats a little bit more. The retreats have always limited A a bit more, for A is naturally an outgoing social kind of person.
In written communication A is enthusiastic, optimistic, wants to share achievements wanting praise like the rest of us, expects the world to react in the open honest straightforward way A approaches the world. Except to close family, A never refers to the Asperger's condition; it is that part that A feels is very hidden and that is how the unaware world deals with A.
So - often A is used; by carers, by older, wiser, craftier, contacts. A can be manipulated without knowing it and has been used as part of a game plan by others, then is left to carry the brunt of reactions to the little game. A protests it was not so and is bewildered. Close friends and family have to wait until A's strong emotions have subsided a little so that A is open to having the scenario explained so that A can appreciate how it happened, to build a bit more onto the protective shield, from that experience.
A thinks, hopes, the humiliations of teenage years, the pre-diagnosis years, are in the past. A now has a public profile in the voluntary role A carries out and is well known in that circle, community and geographical area. A is more protected by the fact of having a public image, and gregariousness that suits that voluntary role.
We still have to look out for A, just in case A unwittingly, or encouraged by others; drops a pebble in the pond and is suprised by the ripples that come crashing back to the shore.
POSTSCRIPT:
Andrea has written an informative and worrying piece on this condition in American society, and commentators affected have given their experiences. Read it by clicking on THIS
I have a close relative, aged late 20s, with Asperger's. A was always the brightest kid on the block. Some years ago on work experience, before there was a diagnosis, A wiped the computers of the company providing the work experience, beyond and below the computers' factory settings. A was a bit of a genius, still is, with computers, but in those days was still experimenting.
Some years on, A has found an appropriate niche and is safe, as safe as any of us can be in this world, and enjoying life so far as a disablist society will allow. That means A has sheltered employment, sheltered accommodation and an accompanied social life.
A is still taken advantage of, usually without realising it until later, or when it is explained, then A is embarrassed and quiet and very hurt and retreats a little bit more. The retreats have always limited A a bit more, for A is naturally an outgoing social kind of person.
In written communication A is enthusiastic, optimistic, wants to share achievements wanting praise like the rest of us, expects the world to react in the open honest straightforward way A approaches the world. Except to close family, A never refers to the Asperger's condition; it is that part that A feels is very hidden and that is how the unaware world deals with A.
So - often A is used; by carers, by older, wiser, craftier, contacts. A can be manipulated without knowing it and has been used as part of a game plan by others, then is left to carry the brunt of reactions to the little game. A protests it was not so and is bewildered. Close friends and family have to wait until A's strong emotions have subsided a little so that A is open to having the scenario explained so that A can appreciate how it happened, to build a bit more onto the protective shield, from that experience.
A thinks, hopes, the humiliations of teenage years, the pre-diagnosis years, are in the past. A now has a public profile in the voluntary role A carries out and is well known in that circle, community and geographical area. A is more protected by the fact of having a public image, and gregariousness that suits that voluntary role.
We still have to look out for A, just in case A unwittingly, or encouraged by others; drops a pebble in the pond and is suprised by the ripples that come crashing back to the shore.
POSTSCRIPT:
Andrea has written an informative and worrying piece on this condition in American society, and commentators affected have given their experiences. Read it by clicking on THIS
Labels: Asperger's Syndrome, Disablism, Negativity
posted by Sally at 5:30 pm
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